Test Fail

Shipwreck.

Prison.

Beatings.

Snakebite.

Prison.

Shipwreck.

Starvation.

Beating.

I look at this list and think to myself, "Hmm...my life seems pretty peachy-keen."

When did you ever hear the apostle Paul complain to God? When did we ever read of him whine about "All I'm trying to do is teach people about you, God! Why can't you keep these things from happening to me?!?"

Nope. He knew all along that the reason all these terrible events happened to him was because the adversary knew what Paul was doing. If the adversary didn't stop Paul, the word of the Messiah would spread all - over - the - world. He HAD to be stopped!

So, we can read of all the catastrophes that happened to Paul as a list of horrendous situations. Or we can look at those events as a long list of some of satan's greatest failures.

Glass half empty or half full?

"In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed." I Peter 1:6-8

Recently I've been tested. And, I will confess, more than once I desired to admit defeat, give up, lie down and be done. I knew in my heart God was calling me to be a witness. But, I did not want that calling. I was tired. I said it over and over: "I'm exhausted." And I was surrounded by a variety of people: some encouraging me to stay strong, many encouraging me to give in. (FYI - the folks you surround yourself with during a time of crisis are critical to your being able to declare victory or defeat).

This past week, in my journey along this latest path, I've realized that I failed my latest test. God allowed the experience to refine my faith-that it may be proved entirely genuine. I stumbled. I crumbled. I pulled the covers over my head for a while and begged God to take me out of the battle.

This past week - terribly humbled.

Yet, I know that means another test will come. That's one of the greatest aspects of being in love with God - do overs.

I desire not to be afraid and filled with dread. Instead, I will take this time to "armor up" and ready myself for the next round to come. God NEEDS my faith proven genuine. And I know that I'm going to keep stumbling along the same path over and over until I learn what I need to learn and allow my faith to lead.

So, satan, bring it.

God, allow it.

And I'll prayerfully get prepared.